Day Four: The Show Me State

Day Four: The Show Me State

When we rolled out this morning, the Missouri sky was painted a soft gradient blue, with only a wispy trace of clouds occasionally floating past. It was an absolutely perfect morning… and 87 degrees.

It was the first morning we started out without a jacket, and the only day without rain. The “Show Me” state showed us rolling hills and beautiful landscapes, dotted with farms, barns and grazing cows. Route 34 West was a flawless blend of curves and short straights, blended together like an impeccable cup of coffee, the perfect start to the morning.

After a stint on Route 60, we found ourselves back on course, so to speak, Route 76 west, another sweeping, rolling and green ride. The one thing I didn't understand about Missouri's roadways. They are identified by letter - Route A, JJ, Z, F, DD, and more. What happened? Did they run out of numbers?

Branson, Missouri

Today, our ride tended in Branson, Missouri. Someone told me it was a Christian Las Vegas, but their official Branson Tourism site  (http://www.bransontourismcenter.com/ ) boasts that they are the ‘live entertainment capital of the world.’

After cleaning up from the ride, we decided to exercise our right to exercise and walked down Main Street, also known as “The Strip”, to find a place to eat and indulge in an adult beverage (we settled on Landry's Seafood). Every marquis flashes recognizable names like The Platters, The Osmonds, Bill Haley’s Comets, Paul Revere and the Raiders and more. Dinner and a show. Just like Vegas!

Now before you go into a starry-eyed entertainment frenzy, there’s a few things I’d like you to consider. The Platters’ last hit was in1968. What you don’t see until you’re closer to the marquis is that you’re paying for is a “tribute” to the Platters. Not the real thing. In fact, there are a lot of tribute performances.  One for John Denver. Another for Patsy Cline. Marty Haggard does a tribute to his dad, the country great Merle Haggard, who, by the way, is out on his own tour. (For dates and times, see http://merlehaggard.com/tour-dates/). There’s a Marty Robbins tribute, Hank Williams Revisted, and of course, Legends in Concert, where you can see amazing interpretations of George Strait, Buddy Holly, Marilyn Monroe, the Blues Brothers, Garth Brooks and more.

Paul Revere and the Raiders? This group has been around for so long, they may have ridden to the Old North Church.

The Osmonds are not the cute, squeaky-clean siblings of the 1970’s, but for $35, you can see the aging, graying brothers sans Donny. Baby brother Jimmy, who’s now  48 and owns the theatre, also performs on occasion. But the boys from Utah won’t be back in town again until September.  And speaking of the Osmonds, Andy Williams is headlining in Branson for 6 weeks beginning in September. Andy Williams? Really?  Moon River? Really? He was great in his time, but how old is he? He’ll be 84 in December. Really? Yes, really. (By the way, he’s headlining in HIS Moon River Theatre. Just saying……)

There’s a Titanic museum, built half scale to the original massive and doomed 1912 ocean liner. It boasts 400 priceless artifacts and the opportunity to get to know real passengers through their personal memorabilia. It’s true that everything on display once belonged to a passenger or crew member, but there’s no James Cameron influence here. All the artifacts were taken off the ship when it sank or were found floating among the debris.

And what “strip” would be complete without all you can eat buffets, three-for-ten dollars tee shirts and Elvis? Happy to say, Branson doesn’t disappoint there.

For folks who like this kitschy kind of entertainment, or for those who are looking to take a trip down memory lane, as Bob Barker would say, “Come on down”. (We didn’t check, but Bob might be featured in the Branson Hollywood Wax Museum.) This is definitely my dad's country music, yet, there are a lot of folks here…buses full… so they must be doing something right. It's just not my type of vacation spot. Give me a Civil War battlefield anytime!

PS. Happy birthday to our beautiful daughter, Courtney!! Love ya!